Honest Engineering Resumes!

After writing fake resumes for some XYZ or ABC during school days, it was finally time to make a real legit one. As simple and straightforward as it sounds. DO NOT THINK IT IS A CAKEWALK! Making a resume requires herculean effort, mainly beacause you have to lie straight through your teeth.
Why you ask?
Well here's how resumes would look like if we were being totally honest!

1. On the resume: My objective is to make possible the impossible, no matter how arduous the job assigned be.
    Real Meaning:

2. If you are applying for a job at Playboy, honesty would be good!

3. You could just say," I have several backlogs in mathematics because I love the subject so much, I just could not get enough of it."

4. Simply turn your weakness into your strength!

5.On the resume: Love adventures, adrenaline junkie.
  Real meaning: Avoided drop like a boss!

6. You could write about the gang you founded only 
  if 
  {the company you are applying to is D-COMPANY}
   else
   {don't even think about it};

7. On a serious note, never let your friends write your resume.
8. Let the interviewer know that you have a good personality, and will be a cheerful ever smiling addition to his office.

9. Engineering does teach you certain skills you could be actually proud of. Beware of cops though!

10. Finally; honesty might be the best policy, but brutal honesty will take you places! If you are honest about your bio and decide you are going to adhere to it. This might be the result:
Bio:

Brutal honesty:

Well, that was it.
Disclaimer: DO NOT try to imitate these into your resume.
All the best to everyone out there making resumes. Get creative and hope you end up with a good one.
Again, no offense to anyone. I only have permission from like half of my classmates here. You all are the real gems!
Thanks for reading it through. Do +1, comment, share. 
Until next time,
Au Revoir!

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